Healing After a Narcissistic Mother’s Death: Start Here
Welcome!
The Weight of Belief launched January 16, 2025.
You were told that when a mother dies, grief is sadness.
But when the mother was a mean narcissist, grief is something else entirely. It’s unexpected, complicated, terrifying, and agonizing.
And if you aren’t prepared for what’s coming, it can swallow you whole.
I know because it happened to me.
Though my expertise is in the experience of daughters of narcissistic mothers, The Weight of Belief may also resonate with sons of narcissistic mothers and adult children of narcissistic fathers.
If you’ve lost a narcissistic parent, the emotional wreckage they left behind doesn’t discriminate.
And, while my focus isn’t on navigating relationships with narcissistic spouses, you may still find insights here that reflect your experience in ways you weren’t expecting.
Welcome to The Weight of Belief,
Carole
1) What is The Weight of Belief?
The Weight of Belief is what I carried when my mean narcissistic mother died.
The weight of every belief she instilled in me—the fear, the unworthiness, the doubt, the guilt.
The weight of realizing I only had eight months to process what she was (it took me 53 years to accept that she was a narc) before she was gone forever.
The weight of discovering that her death didn’t set me free—it set off an entirely new battle for my freedom.
And if you’re here, I have a feeling you understand.
This space isn’t about rehashing the past.
You already know what she was.
This is about what healing looks like after a narcissistic mother dies.
The aftermath.
The reckoning.
The extremely confusing grief.
The truths that surface when she’s no longer here to control them.
This is the part no one talks about.
Through The Weight of Belief, I share how I navigated The Hollow Passage—the place where I came undone, where everything I thought I knew shattered, where I was forced to confront the aftermath of my mother’s death and the weight of my beliefs.
It’s where I realized I had to completely rebuild my life.
I’ll share the truths I uncovered, the conversations I never got to have (but later did—through a psychic medium), and how I finally reconstructed myself after over five decades of being shaped by her.
You’re not alone. And you don’t have to carry the weight of belief forever.
2) What makes The Weight of Belief different?
You already know what a narcissistic mother (father) is.
You’ve spent decades walking on eggshells, questioning yourself, and trying to make sense of the impossible.
And now—she’s gone.
Maybe you thought her death would bring relief. Maybe you thought you’d finally be free.
But instead, you’re here, standing in the aftermath, realizing that grief isn’t what the world told you it would be.
No one prepared you for this.
No one warned you about the emptiness, the confusion, the unexpected waves of relief followed by guilt, or the complicated wreckage left behind.
This isn’t the kind of grief people talk about—this is something else entirely.
This is where The Weight of Belief comes in.
This isn’t another resource explaining narcissistic abuse—you already lived it.
The Weight of Belief is about what happens after she’s gone.
It’s about navigating The Hollow Passage—that’s what I call the disorienting space where relief and devastation collide.
It’s about self-reconstruction, because after a lifetime of her voice shaping your reality, you now have to decide:
Who am I without her?
I had only eight months to process what my mother was before she died (it took me 53 years to realize she was a mean narcissist!).
I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t prepared.
And my passage through The Hollow swallowed me whole.
There was no blueprint for healing from this kind of loss—so I had to create my own.
The Weight of Belief is my blueprint—a testament to how I found my way through.
Not as a rigid step-by-step guide, but as a springboard—a place to see yourself in someone else’s story and begin to find your own way forward.
But maybe you’re not here because she’s gone—maybe you’re here because you’re wondering what it will be like when she is.
If your narcissistic mother is gravely ill or if you’re simply trying to prepare yourself for the inevitable (it’s absolutely OK to be curious!), The Weight of Belief can help you understand what no one else talks about.
This space exists for the daughters (and sons) who have already lost their narcissistic mothers, but also for those who are waiting—wondering what grief will look like, how it will feel, and if freedom will ever truly come.
This is what no one tells you about life after the narcissistic mother is gone. But I will.
Healing after a narcissistic mother’s death is unlike anything else—this space exists to show you what that really means.
3) The Framework of The Weight of Belief
Healing after the death of a narcissistic mother is unlike any grief the world recognizes.
There’s no roadmap, no guidebook—just the wreckage she left behind and the impossible task of figuring out what comes next.
The Weight of Belief exists to illuminate the unspoken realities of life after she’s gone.
This framework breaks down the core areas of TWOB, helping you navigate The Hollow Passage, self-reconstruction, and the unexpected truths that emerge along the way.
Explore the Framework of Healing After a Narcissistic Mother’s Death
🔹 TWOB: The Hollow Passage (the core of TWOB)
The Hollow Passage is the consuming, untethered space I entered after my narcissistic mother died.
It is where decades of repressed emotions collide with fresh wounds of grief, relief, and betrayal.
It is not the freedom I expected—it is the reckoning I never saw coming.
I named The Hollow Passage to describe what this experience feels like—it is not a term you will find in professional journals or psychology textbooks.
But if you are here, you don’t need a clinical definition—you need to know you’re not alone in this.
Here, I share the raw, unspoken truths of what it’s like to lose a narcissistic mother—before I felt ready, before I processed her abuse, before I even understood what she was. This is the part no one prepares you for.
🔹 TWOB: Heart & Mind (my internal shifts to self-reconstruction)
Healing doesn’t happen by pushing through—it happens by facing everything we were never allowed to feel.
This section is where belief work begins.
Here, I explore the deep internal shifts that happened when I left my survival identity behind.
It’s about learning who I was without her, undoing the mental conditioning she embedded, and reclaiming my right to exist—fully, freely, and in my power.
🔹 TWOB: Body (healing my physical weight of belief)
When I lived with my parents as a caregiver and was exposed to my mother on a daily basis, the stress was unbearable.
To cope, I turned to food. Lots of food.
It was the only thing I felt safe with. And I gained a lot of weight.
This section follows my ongoing journey of physical healing and weight loss.
When I stopped carrying the weight of survival, my body finally let go of its fat, too.
🔹 TWOB: Soul (the truths I found beyond the veil)
My mother’s death left me with questions I never, ever thought I’d get answers to.
But I did.
This section explores the spiritual side of my healing journey, including channeled conversations with my mother’s spirit, my father’s spirit, Jeshua ben Joseph, the Divine Feminine, my soul, and my spirit guides.
These weren’t just messages—they were truth bombs that unraveled everything I thought I knew.
4) The Conversations We Never Had: Premium Content
Some questions never get answered.
Some wounds never get acknowledged.
Some conversations around WHY—the ones I needed most—never happened.
Until they did.
When my mother died, she took her secrets, manipulations, and distortions with her.
But The Hollow Passage did not free me—it swallowed me whole.
And I was left with a lifetime of unresolved pain, unanswered questions, and truths I wasn’t sure I would ever find.
There was one major question I could not let go of: WHY?!?
Why me? Why did she abuse me?!?
Why did she destroy my father?
What happened to her that made her this way?
And now that she’s on the other side—does she see it? Does she regret it? Does she even care?!?
Why did my dad enable her?
Why did my sibling not have a similar experience with my mother?
My craving for answers was incessant, unrelenting, and all-consuming.
And then, something I never expected happened: I spoke with her again.
And she spoke back!
Through my sessions with a psychic medium, I uncovered truths that shattered everything I thought I knew—about her, about myself, about what healing truly means.
These weren’t the words of the woman I feared my entire life.
These were revelations from her highest self, the one that only emerged after death.
And they didn’t just bring me closure.
They gave me answers I never imagined I’d receive!
This section, The Conversations We Never Had, is where I share those private, tear-jerking, channeled sessions.
Each entry is raw, intimate, and deep.
These aren’t dramatized stories—they are real transcriptions from my multiple, hour-long mediumship sessions, where my mother, my father, Jeshua ben Joseph, the Divine Feminine, my spirit guides, and my own soul revealed truths I never thought I would hear.
These intense, yet clarifying conversations changed me.
They helped me heal in ways nothing else could!
And now, for those who feel called to explore what lies beyond The Hollow Passage, they are here for you.
Accessing this content: due to the depth, emotional weight, and unique exclusivity of these conversations, they are available only through premium access.
This is not because I want to keep the cornerstone of my healing behind a gate (I give you plenty of insights in my free blog posts)—it’s because these conversations are sacred, personal, and unlike anything else I’ve shared or you’ve read anywhere.
If you choose to step into them, know that you are entering something deeply transformative.
➡ Join the waitlist to know when The Conversations We Never Had is available.
5. Ways to Engage & Work With Me
Healing after the death of a narcissistic mother is a journey that doesn’t come with a blueprint—but you don’t have to navigate it alone.
The Weight of Belief exists to illuminate what no one tells you about life after she’s gone, and there are several ways you can engage with this work, deepen your self-reconstruction, and find guidance along your own path.
📞 Peer-to-Peer Support Calls via Zoom (COMING SOON!)
Sometimes, what we need most is someone who’s been there.
My upcoming peer-to-peer support calls will be a space for real conversations with someone who understands the depths of The Hollow Passage because I’ve lived it.
These Zoom calls aren’t about giving advice or offering a prescription for healing because I am not a licensed therapist (nor do I pretend to be one).
These 45-minute calls are about offering perspective, validation, and insight from someone who has walked this path before
➡ COMING SOON: Join the waitlist for peer-to-peer support calls to be notified when they’re available.
📖 Free Booklist: 3 Books That Impacted My Healing Journey: A spiritual booklist for healing and transformation (available now!)
I didn’t heal by following a traditional path—I healed by following breadcrumbs.
Books were a huge part of that journey.
My free booklist includes the top three most impactful spiritual reads that shaped my self-reconstruction.
A gentle note: This booklist reflects the resources that profoundly shaped my personal healing journey. Some of the concepts and perspectives may feel unconventional or even challenging, especially if viewed through a deeply-religious lens. I encourage you to approach these books just like I did: with an open mind and curiosity, taking only what resonates with you. Healing is a deeply personal process and there’s no right or wrong way to explore it.
📓 Digital Undated Healing Planner-Journal in Development (coming soon!)
Your healing journey isn’t just emotional—it’s also about creating structure and self-awareness as you move forward.
I’m currently developing digital products, including an undated healing planner-journal designed to help you navigate the emotional weight of this process while balancing real-life responsibilities.
➡ COMING SOON: Join the waitlist for my undated healing planner-journal to be notified when they’re available.
📲 Follow Me on Instagram (@TheWeightOfBelief) for Daily Insights
Healing doesn’t just happen in big, breakthrough moments—it happens in the everyday shifts.
On Instagram, I share daily reflections, thought-provoking insights, and real conversations about life after the narcissistic mother is gone.
🚫 No Blog Comments Policy—Positive Conversations Only
I’ve chosen to disable blog comments because this space is not for trolls, flying monkeys, or negativity.
If you’d like to reach out, I welcome positive, respectful conversations.
💌 Email me at: hello@weightofbelief.com
6) Must Read Blog Posts
These posts dive into the raw, unspoken realities of healing after my narcissistic mother was gone—the reckoning, the unraveling, the identity shifts, and the deep internal work no one prepared me for.
Each one offers a window into my passage through The Hollow, sharing insights that may help you begin making sense of your own.
📌 The Day My Denial Died: The First Step in My Healing from Maternal Narcissistic Abuse The truth was always there—I just couldn’t let myself see it. Denial kept me safe until the day it didn’t. This post is about the moment everything changed, the day I could no longer pretend my mother wasn’t who she was, and how that first, brutal truth became the foundation of my healing.
📌 The Reckoning: You Didn’t Survive Just to Stay Stuck or Play Small! When you’ve spent your entire life just trying to stay afloat, it can be terrifying to ask yourself: Now what? This post explores the reckoning that comes after survival—the realization that you didn’t endure all of this just to keep living small.
📌 Changing the Lens: How an Observation Shift Transformed My Healing I didn’t start healing by “doing the work.” I started healing by watching my thoughts. This post is about the moment I stepped out of my conditioned survival responses and saw my own patterns for the first time—without judgment, without gaslighting myself, just observing. And that changed everything.
📌 I Didn’t Heal Using Clinical Definitions—My Healing Was in the Trenches The world tries to define healing through clinical terms and step-by-step processes. But that’s not where I found mine. I healed in the trenches, in the mess, in the spaces where no textbook could prepare me. This post is about the raw, unfiltered version of healing that no one talks about—and why it worked for me.
📌 From Numb to Awake: How I Turned the Corner into Emotional Awareness (And Why Resting Without Guilt Is Non-Negotiable) I thought I was fine because I wasn’t actively falling apart. But in reality, I was numb. I spent decades suppressing every real emotion just to function. This post is about what it took to finally break through the numbness, why rest is a non-negotiable part of emotional awareness, and how I learned to stop treating stillness as laziness.
These posts will give you a starting point for navigating The Hollow Passage, shifting your beliefs, and moving toward self-reconstruction.